I have written and spoken much over the years about “family fusion” – Dr. Murray Bowen’s description of how family members give up “self” in order to maintain “togetherness.” The lack of self-differentiation in one’s growing-up family predictably shows up in one’s marriage, children, friendships and work systems. “No-self” individuals have a difficult time building healthy relationships. “Needing to be liked” Because emotional fusion usually occurs without consciousnes

Can family members who work together benefit from emotional separateness? Blanket reverence for family togetherness often shields family members from an unpleasant reality: too much closeness can destroy relationships. Nowhere is this more visible than in family businesses, where the cauldron of emotions among siblings and parents (and sometimes, uncles, aunts and grandparents) easily bubbles to an intensity level that exceeds the family’s capacity to manage it. Having

Every week, I hear some form of this question from business owners, young adults, and mid-lifers. It comes from those just getting started and from those who have “been there, done that.” (In one recent day, I heard this question from a 17-year-old student and a 92-year-old grandmother!) An important dimension of “Where Do I Go From Here With My Life?” is discovering the work that best “fits” me. How do I figure this out? There’s no sure-fire formula. The increasing co