Risk and novelty can get us into trouble, but the power of the familiar might be even more dangerous. That's because what we are used to goes down easily. Familiarity offers security and a sense of control. There are no new steps to take, no difficult questions, few, if any, obstacles. Life is good – until it's not. Ease, in any facet of life, can blind us to possible hazards. It also presents no challenges, no new thinking, no creativity. Clinging to familiarity, we become

The final segment in a monthly series of 11 posts presenting my thinking and experience on the topic of coaching Last month, I discussed four distinctive triangle patterns that leaders regularly observe as coaches in organizations: solution requests, exclusion moves, anxious agreement and bickering colleagues. This month, I’ll suggest guiding strategies and skills for managing oneself in any relationship triangle. Then, I’ll apply those guidelines to the four patterns ment

The tenth in a monthly series of 11 posts presenting my thinking and experience on the topic of coaching. “When there is finally one who can control his emotional responsiveness and not take sides with either of the other two, the emotional intensity within the twosome will decrease and both will move to a higher level of differentiation (maturity).” Murray Bowen, M.D. Humans have developed a superb mechanism for managing anxiety: We dump on each other. Our dumping takes